This is a copy of an email I sent to my friend, Ed Kerr. We sell quite a few of Ed’s keyboard DVDs, and had just received a shipment from him. So I sent him a “special” note:
As a bona fide chocaholic, my heart nearly skipped a beat when I saw the box being delivered. Emblazoned on the side was “Russell Stover” and “Whitman’s.” For someone like me, those words are nearly sacred. My mouth watered in anticipation.
I wondered who would have been so thoughtful to send me such a large box of chocolates. The thrill! The excitement! I was almost too nervous to open the box. The confections that awaited within the confines of that simple cardboard container were intoxicating my mind before I ever even opened the box.
But then came the despair. Who would have played such a cruel trick? Who could possibly be so dastardly and underhanded? Inside were not chocolates at all. Only DVDs. Oh, certainly they were DVDs from my friend, Ed Kerr. That’s better, I suppose, than some generic videos from a stranger. But they definitely were not chocolate. I know that for sure because in my excitement I bit into one of them. Bleeccchhh!! Plastic!
What a let down. My hopes, so recently soaring, were dashed on the rocks of despair. My anticipation buried in the rubble of misery and anguish. I lay here in a crumpled heap, the recipient of a fiendish prank, wondering if I will ever recover…
So, let that be a lesson to you. Don’t send me anything in a box marked “chocolates,” unless, of course, it really is chocolates. 🙂